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If this is as low as Bear fans think it goes, Mike "Glen or" Glennon's got a few tricks up his sleeve he'd love to show you in a few days against the Minnesota Vikings. And the way things are looking, the bunch of bums currently calling themselves Chicago Bears just might give him the chance.
In a nod to the shitstains down Glennon's legs, the Bears donned dark blue pants for their prime time matchup against Green Bay. Nervous as an undeserving rookie from the get-go, Glennon looked like the worst Bear quarterback since Jonathan Quinn in a lopsided 35-to-14 loss to the Green Bay Packers, and considering Craig "The Exec(rement)" Krenzel, Todd Collins, Caleb Hanie, Matt Barkley and Jimmy "Pickles" Claussen have come since, that is saying something. The remainder of the Bears "responded" to Glennon's putridity, laying yet another embarrassing egg on national television in a way the team seems to have patented over the last decade . . .
. . . This isn't about Bear players anymore, and how they ran their routes, manned their coverages, or any of the X's and O's. It is about the men who have placed them in the positions they are in. Men like "If I'm Lyin' I'm" Ryan Pace. Is it Josh Bellamy's fault that he is a bad football player? Is it Leonard Floyd's fault that he has been unacceptably invisible for most of the season? Is it - for Halas's sake - Mike Glennon's fault that he's the player he is? Not really. The responsible party is Pace, who is now confirmed to have blown his first two first-round draft picks. With a record like Pace's, maybe there's good reason he and crotchety, bastardic Head Coach John Fox isn't being allowed to show the world Pace's latest opus. Indeed, with Pace at the helm, Mitch Trubisky may not be anything Bear fans are going to want when they find out what he is.
Fox is getting the blame for sticking with the obviously overwhelmed Glennon. But even John Fox, whom the game has clearly passed by, can see incompetence when it pools as poo in front of him. Fox is being ordered to play Glennon by Pace, who convinced the McCaskey's to overspend in bringing him here to complete what appears to have been a bizarre three-year odyssey following him around the NFL. Pace's powers - already minimized by the McCaskey's when they forced him to hire Ernie Accorsi's choice for Head Coach - would be further eroded by admitting such stunning failure with Glennon. But Pace isn't fooling anyone - Glennon is so incompetent that anyone insisting he belongs on an NFL field discredits themselves more than admitting (yet another) talent evaluation mistake ever could . . .
. . . So you wanna know about the game? Fine. Glennon was absolute garbage, embarrassing from the get-go, and quickly devolved into farce with a snap that bounced off his knee. Jordan "Hubba Hubba" Howard ran hard much longer than he should have had to, as the idiotic Fox left him on the field in an unwinnable game to take hits from a teed-off Packers team. Tarik "The Freak" Cohen still plays hard, but the rest of the NFL is beginning to catch on. Connor "Barf" missed another makeable field goal and should be replaced. And Danny Trevathan unloaded on Packers receiver Davante Adams with one of the dirtiest, most premeditated hits in recent memory, then stood around bobbing and weaving self-congratulatorily. Trevathan will certainly earn a fine, deserves a suspension, and is a bona fide piece of garbage for what he did out there last night . . .
. . . Then there's the shoopster's old friend Vic Fangio. The Vaunted One floats in the ether above the muck, heralded by so many in the fanbase as the fix for this flak. Don't believe it. His bend-don't-break defense breaks frequently. It's all the fault of the offense of course, including the 3-year absence of a pass rush, the inability or absolute refusal to dial up a blitz, and the fact that his corners routinely play softer than even Lovie "LaCucaracha" Smith's notoriously did (on the Packers last score from the 5, two defenders were lined up IN THE ENDZONE, to defend, apparently, against a Lambeau Leap). Fangio is a fraud; if you want the guy who built the formidable 49ers defii (pl: defense) that Fangio routinely takes credit for, contact Mike Singletary. He pulls his pants down too, but does it voluntarily, while Fangio's been getting pantsed for three years now . . .
. . . With 10 days before the next debacle, oddsmakers are laying bets that the woebegone Mike Glennon era is over. But don't believe it. Sure, Ginny's probably pissed again, but she's still asking when Jay's going to go in. This is a franchise in disarray that has lost all sense of pride. "King" George McCaskey is 23-46 as CEO. There is nothing positive happening right now for this franchise, and for those who think Mitch Trubisky could be the cure-all, keep in mind who picked him.
Ryan Pace is a failure, and the Bears don't deserve the fans they have.
In a nod to the shitstains down Glennon's legs, the Bears donned dark blue pants for their prime time matchup against Green Bay. Nervous as an undeserving rookie from the get-go, Glennon looked like the worst Bear quarterback since Jonathan Quinn in a lopsided 35-to-14 loss to the Green Bay Packers, and considering Craig "The Exec(rement)" Krenzel, Todd Collins, Caleb Hanie, Matt Barkley and Jimmy "Pickles" Claussen have come since, that is saying something. The remainder of the Bears "responded" to Glennon's putridity, laying yet another embarrassing egg on national television in a way the team seems to have patented over the last decade . . .
. . . This isn't about Bear players anymore, and how they ran their routes, manned their coverages, or any of the X's and O's. It is about the men who have placed them in the positions they are in. Men like "If I'm Lyin' I'm" Ryan Pace. Is it Josh Bellamy's fault that he is a bad football player? Is it Leonard Floyd's fault that he has been unacceptably invisible for most of the season? Is it - for Halas's sake - Mike Glennon's fault that he's the player he is? Not really. The responsible party is Pace, who is now confirmed to have blown his first two first-round draft picks. With a record like Pace's, maybe there's good reason he and crotchety, bastardic Head Coach John Fox isn't being allowed to show the world Pace's latest opus. Indeed, with Pace at the helm, Mitch Trubisky may not be anything Bear fans are going to want when they find out what he is.
Fox is getting the blame for sticking with the obviously overwhelmed Glennon. But even John Fox, whom the game has clearly passed by, can see incompetence when it pools as poo in front of him. Fox is being ordered to play Glennon by Pace, who convinced the McCaskey's to overspend in bringing him here to complete what appears to have been a bizarre three-year odyssey following him around the NFL. Pace's powers - already minimized by the McCaskey's when they forced him to hire Ernie Accorsi's choice for Head Coach - would be further eroded by admitting such stunning failure with Glennon. But Pace isn't fooling anyone - Glennon is so incompetent that anyone insisting he belongs on an NFL field discredits themselves more than admitting (yet another) talent evaluation mistake ever could . . .
. . . So you wanna know about the game? Fine. Glennon was absolute garbage, embarrassing from the get-go, and quickly devolved into farce with a snap that bounced off his knee. Jordan "Hubba Hubba" Howard ran hard much longer than he should have had to, as the idiotic Fox left him on the field in an unwinnable game to take hits from a teed-off Packers team. Tarik "The Freak" Cohen still plays hard, but the rest of the NFL is beginning to catch on. Connor "Barf" missed another makeable field goal and should be replaced. And Danny Trevathan unloaded on Packers receiver Davante Adams with one of the dirtiest, most premeditated hits in recent memory, then stood around bobbing and weaving self-congratulatorily. Trevathan will certainly earn a fine, deserves a suspension, and is a bona fide piece of garbage for what he did out there last night . . .
. . . Then there's the shoopster's old friend Vic Fangio. The Vaunted One floats in the ether above the muck, heralded by so many in the fanbase as the fix for this flak. Don't believe it. His bend-don't-break defense breaks frequently. It's all the fault of the offense of course, including the 3-year absence of a pass rush, the inability or absolute refusal to dial up a blitz, and the fact that his corners routinely play softer than even Lovie "LaCucaracha" Smith's notoriously did (on the Packers last score from the 5, two defenders were lined up IN THE ENDZONE, to defend, apparently, against a Lambeau Leap). Fangio is a fraud; if you want the guy who built the formidable 49ers defii (pl: defense) that Fangio routinely takes credit for, contact Mike Singletary. He pulls his pants down too, but does it voluntarily, while Fangio's been getting pantsed for three years now . . .
. . . With 10 days before the next debacle, oddsmakers are laying bets that the woebegone Mike Glennon era is over. But don't believe it. Sure, Ginny's probably pissed again, but she's still asking when Jay's going to go in. This is a franchise in disarray that has lost all sense of pride. "King" George McCaskey is 23-46 as CEO. There is nothing positive happening right now for this franchise, and for those who think Mitch Trubisky could be the cure-all, keep in mind who picked him.
Ryan Pace is a failure, and the Bears don't deserve the fans they have.
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