Two Drunk Bear Fans Walk Into A Whore House

Jun 23, 2018

• #21

xer0h0ur

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JUSTWIN said:

Who here has been to a whore house raise their hand.

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Never been to a "whore house" but I have banged hookers. You don't need to go to a whore house in Las Vegas or in Mexico for that matter. They offer their services to your address.

 

Jun 23, 2018

• #22

gwharris2254

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i heard the TITLE and immediately thought of EggBritches and Remy

...........And Wow that chili cook-off RECAP is Friggin PRICELESS

I've been in tears for about ten minutes now and my nose is all plugged up from laugin so hard THANK YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Jun 23, 2018

• #23

gwharris2254

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Fatman Lou you made my day.

Great fuckin yoke/situation/recap/Whatever the fuck you wanna call it/Just plain Funny

 

Jun 23, 2018

• #24

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After the Hunchback of Notre Dame dies the need a new bell ringer so they put out ads for the job. A guy with no arms applies. The priest tells him that there is no way he can do the job as it involves pulling on a large rope that he can't possibly do. The guy begs the priest for a chance swears he can do it, plays the hire the handicapped card, priest relents. they go up 5 stories into the tower. Armless guy kicks a stepladder over to the bell, climbs it, and starts banging the bell with his head. Blood everywear, the priest begging him to stop, he finally conks himself out, falls off the ladder, out the window, down 5 stories. splat! Crowd rushes over, a different priest says "Oh my God, this is terrible, does anyone know who this man is>" A guy in the crowd says "No,but his face rings a bell!"

 

Jun 23, 2018

• #25

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Part 2, abridged version. The next day at Notre Dame they still need a bell ringer and another guy with no arms applies for the job. The priest tells him that he can't possibly give him the job and explains what happened the day before and mentions that the guy looks familiar. The armless guy says that it was his twin brother died yesterday and since he gave him a chance that he should do the same for him. Priest relents. They go up in the tower, same spiel. Conks out, falls off ladder, out window, down 5 stories, splat! Crowd rushes over. Priest says "Oh my God, does anyone know who this man is?" A guy in the crowd says "No, but he's a dead ringer for the guy who was here yesterday!"

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #26

Fatman LOU

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Fatman Lou you made my day.

Great fuckin yoke/situation/recap/Whatever the fuck you wanna call it/Just plain Funny

gwharris2254 , Thanks glad i can help.

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #27

Fatman LOU

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjBrcGeoPNA&feature=youtu.be

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #28

BaBaBlacksheep

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HawkBear said:

Red Light District in Amsterdam count?

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Talk about weird experiences. Just walking down the street, stoned out of my mind (legally), with these ladies in windows calling for a "good time."

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #29

Outlaw Josey Cutler

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benplace said:

Why are they Bears fans? So..Now we can add Bears fans to any comments and make it relevant?

I was with my Bears fan at a Bulls game once and got to see Jordan drop 35, amazing time.

A Bears fan I know thinks Trump is taking credit for Obama's accomplishments, what do you think?

I know a couple of Bears fans that watch Bill Maher shows and now they think religion is a farse, comments?

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Thanks, Fatman for a great thread and I thnaked all the posts that made me laugh.

Had to reply this one directly because it was hands down the funniest here, albeit unintentionally.

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #30

Fatman LOU

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Outlaw Josey Cutler said:

Thanks, Fatman for a great thread and I thnaked all the posts that made me laugh.

Had to reply this one directly because it was hands down the funniest here, albeit unintentionally.

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Thanks Outlaw josey Cutler; yeah benplace seems to be wound -up a little tight.

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #31

Fatman LOU

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BaBaBlacksheep said:

Talk about weird experiences. Just walking down the street, stoned out of my mind (legally), with these ladies in windows calling for a "good time."

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Understand that BaBABlacksheep, i would get the same thing from the woman in the alleys of North Chicago.

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #32

Bearly

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Good thing it wasn't real Bears going into the establishment. Under the Fox regime, they probably leave in splints.

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #33

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Loved it. Would read again. May start a petition for more Fatman Lou posts.

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #34

Fatman LOU

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Guy goes to the urologist for a prostate exam, gets in the fetal position, hears the snap of the rubber glove....

Doc says 'Mr. xxx there's no reason to be embarrassed, it's not uncommon to get an erection in these circumstances'.

Patient says 'But Dr. I don't have an erection'.

Dr says 'No Mr. xxx, but I do

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #35

Spunky Porkstacker

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Fatman LOU said:

Guy goes to the urologist for a prostate exam, gets in the fetal position, hears the snap of the rubber glove....

Doc says 'Mr. xxx there's no reason to be embarrassed, it's not uncommon to get an erection in these circumstances'.

Patient says 'But Dr. I don't have an erection'.

Dr says 'No Mr. xxx, but I do

Click to expand...

Another version, the patient is bent over feeling the exam in progress, the Dr. while standing directly behind him reaches both arms out where the patient can see both hands and exclaims "look no hands".

 

Jun 24, 2018

• #36

Fatman LOU

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A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. Upon getting home, the man informs his wife of his new purchase.

"Olympic condoms?", she asks, "What makes them so special?"

"There are three colors," he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."

"What color are you going to wear tonight?" she asks cheekily.

"Gold of course," says the man proudly.

The wife responds, "Really, why don't you wear Silver? It would be nice if you came second for a change."
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