Family Borrowing Money

[Ares]

If you give it to them, consider it a gift. Don’t expect to get it back

Absolutely true.

 

[airtime143]

I have been "loaning" my mom cash for years- never have seen a cent back. I guess it makes her feel better to phrase it like that.

My lady loans her brother significant amounts of money on a regular basis and he ALWAYS pays it back when he says he will and usually gets her a gift as a thank you.

long story short, it depends on how trustworthy the people are.

 

[Chief Walking Stick]

I don't let anyone borrow money from me because I am not a ****ing bank.

If it is a true hardship circumstance from someone as close to me as a family member, I would rather just give what I can and if the money comes back to me in any form...hooray!

This.

Also, I just downplay a lot of my "wealth" (no Im not rich, but I am smart with my money) and don't buy flashy things. I probably make double what my family thinks I make lol.

 

[Burque]

I have borrowed money, a significant amount, for a down payment on a house, Of course I paid it back, but that is one of the very few times I borrowed money from family.

My thoughts on lending are as follows. I will always lend someone a small amount of money and have the conversation about paying it back. Then I won't bug them about it. If they pay it back, great, if they don't they won't get another dime outta me.

I have had people I loaned (like $40.00) come to me a year or two later and be like: Can I borrow twenty bucks? My response in that situation is: you can borrow 20 once you have paid me back the 40 you owe me. Never got asked for money by that person again, also never got my $40 back.

As far as family I would say unless it is a huge amount it would have to be a gift that you hopefully got returned. Because there is zero sense in putting a wrench in the family dynamics over some lent money. I know a family of six siblings that is basically three versus three because three of them took some money that was for one purpose (helping their mother) and made the executive decision to use it for some other purpose (helping one of the siblings) and now its like that entire family is divided.

 

[didshereallysaythat]

A little while ago, my buddy / co-worker and I were going to lunch down at the cafeteria when he realized he forgot his wallet in his car. So I bought his lunch which was like 8 bucks. Better believe that dude paid me back. Gift my ass.

 

[KittiesKorner]

People have strong opinions about this. My brother and I are secretly/privately paying down a car we arranged for my Mom to get with the title in my brother's name (because it was cheaper to buy it in the state he lives in), which I consider to be a gift, and not expecting to be repaid. If I lend my crazy sister money, however, I absolutely expect repayment with interest. In short, I'm a cuck.

 

[LordKOTL]

I think my bloodline has too much pride to ask for a loan from someone else in the family--except for one relative but she's a straight-up criminal.

I have no problems giving if I'm feeling generous, but I'm not a bank.

 

[Ares]

I just realized I never bothered to throw the reason behind this thread in.

Immediate family member... I already gave 2500$ a couple years ago which was wasted on putting a transmission into a 2001 Ford Explorer which died 6 months later.

Drove a beater from then until June when it died... I had to pay for the tow.

Been driving a borrowed truck for 5 months for free, now the owner wants payment or the truck back.

Said family member "borrowed" 500$ from a friend as a down payment and needs to come up with 3500$ in the next 30 days to complete the purchase.

I'm not doing it, I'd have to pull money out of long-term investments.

I researched bad credit/no credit car dealerships and had a plan for how they could make extra money using Takl to make the payments on a dealer-financed vehicle, but then I found out about the above shitshow.

This has been a pattern of behavior for a very long time, and I don't intend to indulge it any longer.

 

[Crystallas]

I can find them a used but still nice road cruiser bicycle for $30.

Can you lend me $30, I'll make it happen.

 

[ZOMBIE@CTESPN]

I can’t say no to my family

for cousins and friends I take gold as collateral if I even trust them to begin with.

to anyone I don’t want to allow to borrow I just say things are tough right now I can’t do it

 

[Sculpt]

I just realized I never bothered to throw the reason behind this thread in.

Immediate family member... I already gave 2500$ a couple years ago which was wasted on putting a transmission into a 2001 Ford Explorer which died 6 months later.

Drove a beater from then until June when it died... I had to pay for the tow.

Been driving a borrowed truck for 5 months for free, now the owner wants payment or the truck back.

Said family member "borrowed" 500$ from a friend as a down payment and needs to come up with 3500$ in the next 30 days to complete the purchase.

I'm not doing it, I'd have to pull money out of long-term investments.

I researched bad credit/no credit car dealerships and had a plan for how they could make extra money using Takl to make the payments on a dealer-financed vehicle, but then I found out about the above shitshow.

This has been a pattern of behavior for a very long time, and I don't intend to indulge it any longer.

That's understandable. Your family member can get a car loan for that amount at their bank. They can also give the truck owner the 500 and make a payment plan contract.

Since you just gave 2500 a couple years ago, you can rest. But if you wanted to make a family gesture, you could give them an early Christmas gift of cash to help out.

 

[Ares]

That's understandable. Your family member can get a car loan for that amount at their bank. They can also give the trunk owner the 500 and make a payment plan contract.

Since you just gave 2500 a couple years ago, you can rest. But if you wanted to make a family gesture, you could give them an early Christmas gift of cash to help out.

Idk why but when I read this post, the voice in my head sounded like Nandor from What We Do In The Shadows.

 

[Hawkeye OG]

Hey

I just realized I never bothered to throw the reason behind this thread in.

Immediate family member... I already gave 2500$ a couple years ago which was wasted on putting a transmission into a 2001 Ford Explorer which died 6 months later.

Drove a beater from then until June when it died... I had to pay for the tow.

Been driving a borrowed truck for 5 months for free, now the owner wants payment or the truck back.

Said family member "borrowed" 500$ from a friend as a down payment and needs to come up with 3500$ in the next 30 days to complete the purchase.

I'm not doing it, I'd have to pull money out of long-term investments.

I researched bad credit/no credit car dealerships and had a plan for how they could make extra money using Takl to make the payments on a dealer-financed vehicle, but then I found out about the above shitshow.

This has been a pattern of behavior for a very long time, and I don't intend to indulge it any longer.

A wise decision. I think the biggest mistake in this whole thing was dumping $2,500 into a 20 year old car. Your family member could have taken that money and found a much more reliable car somewhere.

 

[Ares]

Hey

A wise decision. I think the biggest mistake in this whole thing was dumping $2,500 into a 20 year old car. Your family member could have taken that money and found a much more reliable car somewhere.

I made that point and was told "No it is fine, once it has a new transmission it'll last a while"

Idk if you can hear my fucking eyes rolling.

 

[Warrior Spirit]

If I know they really need it, I'll give it. I won't ask for it back so if they pay it back sometime in the future, I see it as just a bonus.

 

[MDB111™]

A small loan makes a man your debter.
A large loan makes a man your enemy.

 

[KittiesKorner]

I just realized I never bothered to throw the reason behind this thread in.

Immediate family member... I already gave 2500$ a couple years ago which was wasted on putting a transmission into a 2001 Ford Explorer which died 6 months later.

Drove a beater from then until June when it died... I had to pay for the tow.

Been driving a borrowed truck for 5 months for free, now the owner wants payment or the truck back.

Said family member "borrowed" 500$ from a friend as a down payment and needs to come up with 3500$ in the next 30 days to complete the purchase.

I'm not doing it, I'd have to pull money out of long-term investments.

I researched bad credit/no credit car dealerships and had a plan for how they could make extra money using Takl to make the payments on a dealer-financed vehicle, but then I found out about the above shitshow.

This has been a pattern of behavior for a very long time, and I don't intend to indulge it any longer.

there you go. don't enable them to continue being rewarded or let off the hook for bad behavior or irresponsibility or something